Things I Never Imagined I'd Say As A Mom

Hello pre-parent Sierra, how are you today? Still rolling your eyes when you hear a kid throwing a tantrum at a restaurant or wondering why a parent would let their kid out of the house with two different shoes on? Ha!

Ok, I'm guilty here. It's not always easy to admit when you're wrong but I used to think those things, sometimes. My younger 20 something self would see things out in public and turn to Eric as we'd both look at each other and shake our heads saying, not-ah, not our kids. #foolishness on our part.

Of course we understood to an extent that kids act up and there is no way they are all angels. I can't help and hope (please let there be someone else) who thought things were going to be a certain way before you actually had kids.

We may now be reaping what we sow (Jesus fix it) because A is a handful and a half. He is an amazing boy who is really too smart for his own good. He also has this adorable sweet side to him, like the time he told me, "Momma you're my best girl", melt my heart right there. And then there's other times that we are both in shock and still trying to figure out what in the world set him off and why this is the third tantrum we're battling in the last hour. Lord help us when both of them are throwing tantrums.

So here are a few things I never thought I'd be doing or saying until I had nuggets of my own. You live and you learn.

Me: A, you can't ride on your brother's back, he's not a horse!
A: Yes, I can, he's crawling around like one, see he wants to play horsey (rescue little nugget from getting crushed).

Me: OMG! I, what are you doing?
I: looks up with cheeks packed like a little squirrel only to find he is eating the dogs food (at least it was the natural kind).

Me: I, what do you have in your hand? A runs over...let me see, what is this? It's candy!
Me: Uh oh, (tampons) you guys we need to put them away that's not candy. They're very spicy and will burn your tongue. We don't ever eat them.
A: I like spicy things. 
Me: No you don't put them back! 

Me: A, you can't drag your brother across the floor! (this was when he was tiny)
A: Yes I can, he couldn't see the TV.

A: Momma I want some more bunny snacks.
Me: No not right now.
A: Why?
Me: Because they're sleeping.
A: No they not. It's still sunny out.
Me: Well they need to get their rest..sshhh they're napping. 

Que the dreaded meltdown in public which sometimes results in grabbing something off the shelf for him to eat (I know bad parenting there). Kids and grocery stores, or stores in general, just don't really mix. But how else are you supposed to get anything done. 

Things I've said on more than one occasion...

You can't eat things off the floor.

Why are you licking my cell phone?!?

If you're talking about poop and pee then you need to learn to go on the toilet.

You cannot stand on the dog!

No, we are not bringing a frog into the house (help me, he's not even three yet!)

You can't eat that, you just dropped it in the sand.

Books are for reading not for pulling apart to make a fort.

Please get your bare butt off of my pillow.

Why are there chicken nuggets in the DVD case.

In spite of all the bizarre phrases I've uttered (I'm sure there are some I'm forgetting), they've given us more love than we ever thought possible. We sure have our crazy moments but all of the amazing ones out weigh the tough ones. I know this list will continue to expand over the years and even now we look back and laugh at some of these. As much we are teaching them things on a daily basis they certainly return the favor.

What are some things you never thought you'd be doing or saying as a parent?

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